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The "Systematic Buzz Phrase
Projector"
===> After years of hacking through
etymological thickets at the U.S. Public Health Service, a 63-year-old official named
Philip Broughton hit upon a sure-fire method of converting frustration into
self-fulfillment (jargon-wise). Now euphemistically called the "Systematic Buzz
Phrase Projector", or the SBPP for short, Broughton's system employs a lexicon of 30
carefully chosen 'buzzwords'.
===> The procedure is quite simple. Just think of any
three-digit number, then select the corresponding buzzword from each column. For example,
choosing '257' produces "systematized logistical projection," a phrase that can
then be dropped into virtually any report, article, or document with that ring of
decisive, knowledgeable authority. "No one will have the remotest idea of what you're
talking about," says Broughton, "but the important thing is that they're not
about to admit it."
Column 1 |
Column 2 |
Column 3 |
0. integrated |
0. management |
0. options |
1. total |
1. organizational |
1. flexibility |
2. systematized |
2. monitored |
2. capability |
3. parallel |
3. reciprocal |
3. mobility |
4. functional |
4. digital |
4. programming |
5. responsive |
5. logistical |
5. concept |
6. optional |
6. transitional |
6. time-phase |
7. synchronized |
7. incremental |
7. projection |
8. compatible |
8. third-generation |
8. hardware |
9. balanced |
9. policy |
9. contingency |
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